The Roots of Overprotection
In Japan, some young people grow up under extra care and protection from their parents, especially if they had trouble socially or academically as kids. Many of them struggled to talk to others, make friends, or even attend school regularly. For the parents, these struggles often came with guilt and a strong urge to shield their children from more challenges.
Challenges in the School System
Japanese schools are known for their packed schedules and standardized programs, leaving little room to focus on each student’s individual needs. Public schools and institutions often lack the flexibility and resources to give proper support to students who are struggling.
Because of this, these students are often passed from one department or program to another, with no one truly taking responsibility for their progress. Over time, many of them grow into adults who can’t secure stable jobs, ending up in part-time work or staying financially dependent on their parents.
Overprotection and Dependency
As these parents grow older, moving from their 50s to their 70s or 80s, their protective instincts often become even stronger. Worried that their children might struggle in society, they avoid tough conversations or addressing conflicts. This over-cautious approach creates dependency, leaving their adult children unprepared to live independently.
Many of these grown children become overly sensitive, often blaming others for their struggles while avoiding responsibility for their actions. They live comfortably at home, enjoying meals and daily life without contributing financially, and find it difficult to adjust to workplaces that expect punctuality and accountability.
The Impact on Families and Society
This dynamic takes a serious toll on both families and society. Over time, parents’ resources get drained, leading to financial strain within the household. Hidden frustrations build up, often causing conflict and even aggression among family members. On a larger scale, these tensions can spill into workplaces, where even minor frustrations can lead to major disruptions.
Building Resilience Through Counseling
Counselors and educators play a crucial role in breaking this cycle by helping young adults build resilience and self-awareness. Tackling the root causes of dependency involves two main approaches:
Philosophical Training: Guiding young adults to think deeply about their lives, values, and responsibilities through structured conversations and self-reflection. This approach helps them develop critical thinking skills and find purpose, making them better prepared to face life’s challenges.
Psychological Support: Teaching essential skills like emotional regulation, effective communication, and building self-confidence. With this support, young adults can learn to manage conflicts, take responsibility for their actions, and feel more ready to handle the demands of adulthood.
Moving Forward
As Japan faces the challenges of an aging population and increasing dependency among young adults, it’s essential to tackle these issues with a well-rounded approach. Counselors need to work closely with families, schools, and communities to create environments that encourage independence and resilience.
By addressing the psychological and societal factors involved, we can develop effective strategies to support individuals while strengthening family and community bonds. Through education, counseling, and active engagement, Japan can nurture a generation of confident, responsible young adults who can contribute meaningfully to society. Breaking the cycle of overprotection and dependency will pave the way for a stronger, more resilient future.
We would like to identify who needs counseling or coaching:
Our questions are focused on:
- Behavioral Patterns: Signs of distress, dependency, or lack of coping skills.
- Emotional State: Feelings of stress, anxiety, or low self-esteem.
- Readiness for Change: Willingness to work on personal growth.
- Support Systems: Whether they have access to a supportive environment.
The following is a set of 5 multiple-choice questions designed for teachers, parents, and kids/students. We kindly ask you to answer according to the category that applies to you. Thank you for your cooperation!
For Parents:
- How often do you feel unsure about how to support your child’s personal development?
- A. Always
- B. Often
- C. Sometimes
- D. Rarely
- Do you think your child struggles to manage stress or challenges?
- A. Strongly agree
- B. Agree
- C. Disagree
- D. Strongly disagree
- How often do you feel overwhelmed or stressed by parenting responsibilities?
- A. Very often
- B. Often
- C. Occasionally
- D. Rarely
- How open is your child to discussing their struggles or concerns with you?
- A. Very open
- B. Somewhat open
- C. Not very open
- D. Not open at all
- Would you be interested in professional guidance to better support your child?
- A. Definitely
- B. Possibly
- C. Not sure
- D. No
For Kids/Young Adults:
- How often do you feel stressed or overwhelmed by daily life?
- A. Always
- B. Often
- C. Sometimes
- D. Rarely
- Do you feel comfortable talking to someone about your struggles or feelings?
- A. Always
- B. Often
- C. Sometimes
- D. Rarely
- How well do you think you handle challenges or setbacks?
- A. Very well
- B. Well
- C. Not very well
- D. Poorly
- Do you feel motivated and confident about your future?
- A. Strongly agree
- B. Agree
- C. Disagree
- D. Strongly disagree
- Would you like help building skills like confidence, communication, or stress management?
- A. Definitely
- B. Possibly
- C. Not sure
- D. No
For Teachers:
- How often do you notice students struggling with stress or emotional regulation?
- A. Very often
- B. Often
- C. Occasionally
- D. Rarely
- How equipped do you feel to help students with emotional or social challenges?
- A. Very equipped
- B. Somewhat equipped
- C. Not very equipped
- D. Not equipped at all
- Do you feel some students need additional support outside of school?
- A. Many students
- B. Some students
- C. A few students
- D. None
- How often do you feel parents are unaware of their child’s struggles?
- A. Very often
- B. Often
- C. Occasionally
- D. Rarely
- Would you like professional resources or training to better support students?
- A. Definitely
- B. Possibly
- C. Not sure
- D. No